Many women grow up learning how to care for everyone except themselves. We’re taught the importance of looking put together, but very few of us are taught how to openly talk about vaginal health. So many women quietly experience things like changes in odor, discomfort, imbalance, irritation, or recurring disruptions without ever feeling fully comfortable bringing them into conversation. Instead, questions are searched privately. Concerns are minimized. Discomfort becomes something to silently manage instead of something deserving of understanding and care.
That silence often creates confusion and a shame we learn to carry into isolation. Over time, it begins to affect our self-esteem, our comfort, our intimacy and even the way we move through everyday life. Feeling “off” in your body can affect more than people realize, especially when there’s shame and embarrassment attached to talking about it honestly.
The truth is that many of us have been taught to judge the natural functioning of our bodies as abnormal. As something we should hide.
Menstruation…Unclean.
Discharge….Gross.
Odor….Eeeeyuck.
The language we have been given to describe what our bodies do is demoralizing and the pressure many of us feel to appear “clean,” “fresh,” or “normal” keeps us from having meaningful conversations about what is actually happening. Conversations that are rooted in honesty, and grounded in real life rather than perfection are critical to understanding our bodies and releasing the stigma associated with intimate feminine care. And while every body is different, no woman should feel like she has to navigate those experiences alone.
What it means to care for our bodies, advocate for ourselves, and navigate health challenges is often shaped through relationship. It is shaped through conversations with other women. Through shared stories. Through guidance passed from woman to woman.
Long before products, protocols, or systems were accessible, women relied on one another to make sense of their bodies and their health. Historically, womanhood has always functioned as a necessary infrastructure for wellness.
This is especially true for African American women. For generations, when accessible healthcare, institutional support, or protection were not given to use, we created our own. Our grandmothers gave language to our mothers. Sisters guided sisters. We have always been each others first line of care.
There is nothing shameful about learning your body or asking questions that seem rudimentary. More women are carrying these experiences than we realize. And more women deserve conversations that make them feel seen instead of shame. Many of those conversations are beginning to happen in our communities, homes and online. And maybe that’s where we begin to feel less alone in our journeys.
We invite you to join us as we build community and learn together.
Jordyn,
Big Sister General